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We get a lot of mixed messages about how to attract and keep a lover or partner. On one hand, we are bombarded with information on how to look desirable, what clothes to wear, which hair products and makeup to use. On the other hand, we are told the importance of being ourselves. Neptune, the planet of illusion, helps us put our best “face” forward, instead of helping us learn about who we really are.
Neptune is often prominently featured in the charts of celebrities who make their living being someone else. This planet helps present an image of glamour and beauty. Marilyn Monroe is a classic example, with Neptune in Leo in her First House — the before-and-after photos of her transformation from pretty girl to Hollywood glamour queen show just how effective Neptune’s illusions can be. And we all know how tragically her life turned out.
We now have a whole new venue to practice the art of deception when attempting to meet potential lovers these days — the Internet. It’s amazing what even the smallest amount of tweaking with Photoshop can do to make us look much better in a photograph than we are in cold, hard reality. If we have a strong Neptune aspect to our Sun, Moon or Ascendant — especially by square or opposition — we will be very tempted to “improve” on nature. Those who have Neptune conjunct the Ascendant are particularly good at projecting a facade. The question is … do we want to?
My advice from personal experience … Don’t do it! When Neptune transited my Ascendant and went over Venus in the First House, there were so many projections and false expectations going on that I didn’t have a clue! After Neptune moved on, it felt like sobering up after a night of heavy partying. And I had to go back and start all over figuring out who I was, how I was presenting myself, what I wanted, and so on.
A good look at your natal chart by an unbiased astrologer — not yourself — can be very helpful in determining what part Neptune is playing, if any. The bottom line is that we can only maintain an illusion so long before the facade comes crumbling down, and the real person stands there exposed. That’s when we learn Saturn can be our best friend … because his lessons are always grounded in reality.
